If you didn’t already know who was/wasn’t in your corner, PUBLICLY going through a crisis or tragedy will surely help you identify the weeds in your garden.
Everyone knows I’m furloughed, it’s no secret.
It’s one thing to fall flat on your face when you knew you were intentionally walking down a dangerous, forbidden road. But man let me tell you, it’s something completely different to find yourself in the middle of a crisis that was inflicted upon you, over which you have absolutely no control.
So here we are on day 30...an entire month that I have been home with no work and no pay. As I stood in my kitchen prepping meals for the week, it just dawned on me. I have not heard a single peep from some of my closest friends and family. Not a hello, how are you, I’ve been watching the news (and your Facebook page 👀) and wanted to know if you’re impacted, I’m praying for you. Not even a call to check on the children. Nothing.
How am I just noticing this on day 30? Well the answer is quite simple...I’ve been too busy and too blessed to even notice their absence.
I for one, never expect anyone besides my husband and myself to take care of our immediate family. Even when my sister was murdered and family rallied around us promising to be our village for her children...my husband Edwin and I still had no expectations. We knew at the end of the day the buck would always stop here. We are what we’ve got. We are grown, able-bodied adults with sound minds and many skills. We both have graduate and post graduate degrees. We made the choice to live this life and build this family. And together, with God as our anchor and our primary strength, we know we can do anything!
Here is the moral of this story...expectation births disappointment. Don’t wanna be disappointed by anyone, eliminate your expectations of them. At the same time open your mind and your heart to receive. Because in times of crisis, if you are willing to expand your purview, you will also realize that God ALWAYS provides! And He will use thee most unconventional ways and people to do it!
The people you least expect to hear from will reach out to you...old friends whom you haven’t seen in ages, long distance family whom you haven’t talked to in a while, neighbors who notice your car has been parked at home in the middle of the day, church friends who are eager to pray your misfortune away, sorority sisters and fraternity brothers who instinctively hold you up through the bond on the strength of the shield, colleagues who are just as broken down as you are yet checking in to see how you’re doing and exchanging survival strategies.
The places you least expect to be blessed by will pour out blessings...restaurant and business owners offering free food, goods and services, banks offering loan forbearance and deferment, the realization that you can cut back on monthly expenses and go without so many unnecessary things.
The epiphany that even in the midst of tragedy you can celebrate and be triumphant...not having to use leave hours for personal business and getting things you need to get done, unlimited time with friends and family, an opportunity to get back into the gym and focus on your health and fitness.
Because I have talked to many furloughed feds who are in the same situation, I also know I am not alone. May you all be comforted in knowing you have a village of people who understand how you’re feeling and what you’re going through. No matter how lonely this walk may some days feel, know that you are NOT alone. Let’s continue to support and uplift one another through this and come out better and stronger on the other side. Don’t worry about who ain’t there for you because together, surrounded by the people who wanna be there and know that LOVE is an action word, we are enough! We are a resilient people and together we will get through!
FYI - this is not a cry for help. It’s simply a public service announcement based on something that literally just dawned on me. Praise God we’re GOOD! Actually better than good, we’re GREAT! But a lot of people ain’t! Do better people. Check on your “friends” and “family”
By Brandi Garrett